An Unhappy Christmas

by David Rollert

It was the night before Christmas, when all through the house people were grumpy, even Aunt Gail. Uncle George brought up politics without any care, grandpa lost his temper right then and right there. Grandma hid in her room consumed with dread, while visions of disaster danced in her head. Aunt Jill and Uncle Tom were fuming that James brought that girl to dinner, and his sister was stoking the fire with her sarcastic ire.

When out from the den there arose such a clatter, we sprang from the couch to see what was the matter. What to our wondering eyes should appear, but an argument about who’s casserole was superior. Angry words flew like arrows; insults flung like darts. No quarter was given, no grace meted out. In no time flat the insults moved from culinary prowess to lifestyle choices and from there on to fashion sense and parenting styles. Adults are yelling, small children crying, all want to be done, teens

see their chance to sneak out to do something fun. The holiday is ruined, no joy to be had. All because no one could control their anger and everyone let their fear control their mood. (End parody)

While this little story was fictional and exaggerated, for many people it might reflect what happens at extended family gatherings. Hopefully it does not reflect what happens at church gatherings. But most of us have probably heard horror stories about this sort of thing in the church. The big question is why? Why do these sorts of things happen?

These things often happen because of uncontrolled fear and anger: fear of criticism or rejection; fear of other people’s choices making you look bad; fear of not being able to answer challenges to your beliefs. These fears can quickly lead to anger: anger that someone challenged you or insulted you; anger that people are ruining the event with their bad attitudes; anger about past wrongs vented at any opportunity.

Uncontrolled fear and anger can ruin family gatherings and they can ruin the unity of the church. Consider these two proverbs.

Proverbs 29:25, “The fear of man brings a snare, but he who trusts in the LORD will be exalted.”

Proverbs 15:18, “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but the slow to anger calms a dispute.”

Fear and anger can be controlled. Family life and Christian unity will both be aided when we learn to control our fear and anger. So, for the sake of those around you, learn to control your fear and anger.