Lying as a form of kindness is a very old idea. Some believe that if the truth can hurt a person’s feelings or lead to uncomfortable situations, it should be avoided. If telling a “little white lie” means uncomfortable situations are averted and everyone is happy, this is obviously best. This way of thinking comes from the idea that hurt feelings and discomfort are the absolute worst things ever, and must be avoided at any cost. But, does that hold up to scrutiny?

Many people seem to experience a mental disconnect regarding who they spend time with and the resulting situations in which they find themselves. A person who spends most of their time with negative people may wonder why they are so depressed. A person who spends a lot of time around heavy drinkers may wonder why they can’t stay sober. Someone who spends a considerable amount of time around the chronically unemployed may wonder why they can’t get motivated to get a job...